Exactly the Problem With Twilight →
I want to be the very best, like no one ever was.
although he probably wants a perfect 10 :(
proofmathisbeautiful: txtsfrmlstnght: (203): The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled “why don’t i have a girlfriend?” the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single LOL I’D HIT THAT
Me: i’m listening to pink floyd
Me: piper at the gates of dawn
Me: interstellar overdrive
Me: and it does this thing where the music switches back and forth between channels
Me: right and left
Me: and i’m wearing headphones
Me: it was the aural equivalent of a strobe light
Do not go gentle into that good night, Old age should burn and rave at...– Dylan Thomas
"This ISN'T Twilight" →
it is, however, a porno flick. that me and my girlfriends are chipping in to buy. so we can watch it and laugh at how much better the writing is than Twilight.
An Exchange at the Rocky Horror Cast Party
Mary: Dante kind of had a mini crush on the freshman who played Rocky. Cause he's blonde and has muscles. And is a dude.
Me: Well yeah, he's adorable. I think he's cute anyway.
Mary: He is. I'm waiting to watch all the freshman girls throw themselves on him.
Me: Does he know that he's cute?
Mary: Not yet.
Me: Is he straight?
Mary: Pretty sure.
Me: He'll be an asshole by next year.
proofmathisbeautiful: meredithnyc: Fashion mathematics. It’s funnier than it sounds.
THAT'S NOT A WORD EMMETT. TAKE IT OFF THE BOARD. →
Vampire Fleshlight? →
i believe they’ve misunderstood what the target market of Twilight is.
my flatmate brought home a new "skirt"
Leslie: Isn't it great? It's a skirt.
Me: It looks like, have you seen those like compressed animal shaped things, and you drop them in water and it turns into a towel? It looks like one of those.
Leslie: I might wear it as a circle scarf.
Me: Try it as a tube top.
Leslie: It wouldn't work because my boobs would be exposed.
Me: (feeling the fabric) This is a curtain. I want to hang it in the bathroom. In the shower.
Leslie: No, look. (She wears it as a skirt) It would be really cute with like boots and a big necklace.
Me: It would be really cute draped over that lampshade over there.
Twitter Exchange of Epic Fangirlishness
Me: spent the last 2 & 1/2 hours writing Uncharted 2 fanfiction. NERD. ALERT.
Naughty Dog: @grab_bag Are you going to post it on your blog?
Me: @Naughty_Dog HOLY CRAP YOU GUYS READ MY BLOG!? AND KNOW I EXIST!? I wasn't before but now I'm totally going to ::dashes off to finish::